i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
