I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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