Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
