im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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