hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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