Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
