apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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