The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
im having a threesome with these popsicles
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize