hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
