Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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