What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
