these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
