Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Terrible idea I love it
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
