I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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