We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize