My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize