He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
so let's talk penis.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
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