i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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