people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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