Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
