I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
