I need help removing her.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
