found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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