Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize