Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize