The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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