dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
