I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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