"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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