we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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