i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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