everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
