I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
The air was thick with penises
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
