Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
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