Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
