Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
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