last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize