I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.