I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
