her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I look better un-naked...
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
