I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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