dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
