and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Green mimosas i think yes
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Randomize
