You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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