Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
