she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Ladies don't puke and tell
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
