...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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