I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
This is my gift to your gina
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
