make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
