I will die if light touches me.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize