I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
they're like a gay fantastic four
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
