What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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