i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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